A one word answer to being a guest - No!

As for the bridesmaid thing, I guess it would depend on the situation, quite possibly provided that I could choose it myself so that I didn't end up with a lemon. When my daughter was getting married and I said about the bridesmaid dresses she seemed to think that the bridesmaid ought to pay for her own but I wasn't having any of that although I didn't pay for shoes, we didn't ask her to have special shoes and when I have been a bridsmaid I paid for my own shoes. If the shoes were to be fabric and dyed then they ought to be lumped in with the dress.