No I would certainly not pay to go to a wedding, If you can't afford to don't invite me ! I usually give vouchers, for John Lewis the last one I went to .I think vouchers are a good option as I had 15 pyrex casseroles with those burners under neath (anyone remember them? )as well as loads of towels etc, but I was so grateful to recieve anything and it was so exciting to open the parcels. The best present we had was my cousin paying for the photos , I was married in London in 1965 and the tradition was that the photographer brought the proofs to the evening reception and people ordered their copies then! well we didn't have a penny to bless ourselves with after paying for the wedding and was panicking how we could pay for photos
My lovely cousin without saying anything just payed for them .

As for if a friend asked me to be her bridesmaid , I'd think she'd need locking up

Wendy x