I understand what you are meaning Joannie but there are times when we need to move on and put the past behind us.

I initially was quite 'firm' with Sarah as from 3 weeks old I was on my own with her so I was learning to be a new mum, going through a separation, then later divorce, and was being both mum & dad to her. I lived way out of the city and had to get 2 buses there and back to get to my parents. Because everyone else was out at work during the day I didn't have anyone to talk to and at night when couples were together didn't think it was 'fair' to go and disturb them so I was very much alone for quite awhile. Also, don't know if anyone else in similar position, felt that the wife was watching me behind my back especially if I was talking to the husband on my own!!!!
Sarah was almost 6 when I met and then later married Terry.

Christine