When my FiL passed away we followed his wishes and he had a funeral service held by the funeral director, there was only my MiL, Jay, myself,my son and his his then boyfriend. lt felt strange to me as when my parents both passed away we had the 'normal' service and a wake afterwards, but in a strange way it was a beautiful service, we were allowed to spend a few min in quiet prayer before leaving the Crem. We did have a car for FiL and one for us. My MiL has asked for the same thing for herself, and has actually written this into her will so that we cannot go against her wishes. neither of my parents in law were believers in the strict sense, but always believed that its the way you lead your life that counts and thats how people remember you.